SHARE!

There is something secure about hanging on to our stuff. And it apparently makes interesting script as now we have television shows of people who have taken this (hoarding) to an art form…with dismal results. But the truth is, it is hard to share. I see that in my grandchildren….when they were two or three all of them had such a hard time with this concept. And so they got older and we hounded them out of much of the selfishness. Now when they have a friend over they will share (perhaps for only a short time) their stuff. Sharing is indeed hard.

I know adults who won’t share no matter what and they feel justified in doing so. And as we look at THOSE people, I confess I think it is not an attractive character trait. It is small. It is selfish. It is greedy. Yet, lurking within me (and I bet you!) I can still find myself hanging on to my stuff.

Several years ago I longed for a large van that would hold me and my family and all their friends. I wanted a blue one yet knew it was an impossibility as it was far out of our price range. Beloved spotted one on a used car lot, swung in, found it was absolutely do-able, bought the car and it was mine. I named it Big Blue. It had every bell and whistle on it AND it was diesel which meant we got about 30 miles to a gallon. I Loved, loved, loved my van!

So the day came when I got a phone call from the youth pastor. He wanted to borrow MY VAN for a week, load it with a bunch of unruly (my term) teenagers and drive it hundreds of miles away for a youth camp. My first thought was “ARE YOU KIDDING?!!” My hand gripped tightly around the phone as I said “Hmmm… let me pray about it!” - which simply meant- “Not a chance!”

Beloved thinks different than I do and for that I am grateful. He said, “Well, of course they can use it! After all it belongs to God!”

Really? I thought it belonged to me!

So I pried my fingers off the van and gave the youth pastor the keys and watched Big Blue go out of the driveway knowing full well it would never be the same! And it wasn’t.

One week later it came back. The seat belt holders were both broken. There was a slight stain on the beautiful blue carpet. No, it wasn’t the same. But in some ways it was better. It came back with stories of such adventures and great fun. The trip had been an awesome success and lives had been changed. And soon word got out that Big Blue was available and from then on it was used by everyone. Friends took it on vacation. Youth groups felt it was theirs and used it often. Others used it to move from one place to another or haul large things in it. And our family had awesome and made great memories in Big Blue. And in the end it went to college with Cameron. After she and Jay were married and living in the tiniest apartment on campus, we are sure it became a guest room.

Letting go can be hard. But hoarding our stuff can be even more painful because it enslaves us. Looking back, I can’t even begin to list the great blessings Big Blue was to so many people and through their blessings we were blessed. It totally freed me up to say yes anytime and every time someone asked for it. It became a pleasure.

A month ago we asked Matt and Leslie Buchholz if we could use their gorgeous, totally fabulous home for filming all of the Be Amazing teaching segments. This would require them, along with their baby and three year old, to move out of their home for five days. There would be about twenty-five people in their home during that time using their kitchen, rearranging their furniture, using their electricity and anything else that was needed. They did not hesitate. They simply said “Sure”. And so they packed up and moved out and we and our film crew moved in.

They understand something that took me years to grasp. Everything DOES belong to God and should be used for His glory and for the betterment of others. And of course it will never be the same. In taking down some equipment a chunk of the wall came off. We tracked in dirt and even though everyone tried to be ultra careful, things did not remain the same. They were different.

BUT, in it all, God received the glory and soon we will have twenty-four teaching sessions that we pray will change the way women think about their roles, their families and their homes. And there were twenty-five people who stood in awe of Matt and Leslie Buchholz. They have served as a great example for the rest of us. Share! It is worth it!

A most enormous thanks to Matt and Leslie for serving as such an awesome picture of Jesus Christ to all of us who took part in the filming of Be Amazing. For sure you both truly are!

Give, and it will be given to you. A good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over, will be poured into your lap. For with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.

Luke 6:38

A Great Team-A Great Work

I am taking my last class at Dallas Theological Seminary. It is on the Dynamics of Leadership. I love it…mainly because I agree with everything I am being taught! But one of the points from this week’s lesson has really spoken to me. The point was this: “Few great things are accomplished by one person.” Now just think about that for a minute. I know you will immediately come up with great artists like Michelangelo. He probably worked alone. And yes there was Hemmingway but those guys are few and far between. Let’s think a bit grander. How about space travel? And then there are automobiles and complex computer systems and great hospitals and football teams. Actually my list is way too long for a blog but you get the idea. Great things DO happen when a team of people who are bent on a goal work together in harmony to achieve a singular purpose.

Last Monday our “team” sat at my dining room table for about the hundredth time and poured over every detail of yet another teaching lesson for the Be Amazing Study. It is SO tedious. You can tell who the detail folks are: Eleanor and Traci. Ok that is only two but that is all we need. Then there are those who fade out after about three hours: Michele and Linda. And then there are the rest of us: Robin, and me who can easily support Linda’s and Michele’s plea to wrap it up! But we have pressed on to MANY hours on enough occasions that our heads were spinning and we walked away exhausted and went home to do the cooking and laundry and grocery shopping, etc that is part of our life! This May marks two years we have worked on this project and it will be many more months until it is complete.

We have “perfected” twenty-four lessons and have one (an introduction) go. And then we will begin working on our final talks for filming the end of March. So for the next two weeks the schedule will be tight and much will be demanded of us. God has answered so many of our requests! Wonderful Anita Renfroe graciously filmed 24 -2 minute segments for us. Today we have much of the funding we need, all through prayer. And He has kept us focused and united.

BUT as I look back over our time spent working as a team I marvel at how much we have accomplished. We have six minds pooling thoughts and ideas together. We have six set of eyes looking at the grammar and format of each page in the workbook. We have sensitive ones who can pick up an innuendo from the page that does not inspire the soul. We have those who can encourage the rest of us to press on and together we have a vision.

The Bible says “Where there is no vision the people perish”, but I know we have pushed the walls out on this vision. We are dreaming big. No, we are dreaming so big it can only be a heavenly work if it is accomplished. I hope you are sitting down and I pray you will not laugh. We are asking God to “turn the hearts of women back to their home and to an attitude of righteousness to prepare a people for the coming of the Lord”. (Luke 1:17) That’s it. And so every week we lay that before the Throne of Grace and ask the Lord to hear and answer our prayer.

Won’t you join us?

…the whole body, being fitted and held together by what every joint supplies, according to the proper working of each individual part, causes the growth of the body

for the building up of itself in love.

Ephesians 4:16

New Year, New Adventure

We put the Christmas decorations away a couple of days ago. The house goes from looking festive, shiny, simply screaming out “party”, to simple, quiet and calming. It is always a letdown in many ways and yet there is a part of me that is tired of sugar coated everything (I can’t believe I am saying that!) and festivating (my new word and yes, you may use it) and am ready for a schedule, a purpose and a plan. I am ready for a bit of calmness and reflection and quiet. It is not that I don’t love, love, love Christmas. I DO! Every single part of it, but after too much of everything …shopping, spending, eating, partying ,late nights and later mornings, …I am ready for real life to return.

And so this week, I am back at my desk, no cookies in sight ( well there is a box of toffee sitting just out of reach that Bevy so graciously made and brought in yesterday) and back to focusing on Big Dream Ministries and the New Year. I have always thought there is great freedom in following hard after God and a very special freedom in leading a ministry that never moves unless we clearly sense a “Go” from the Good Shepherd. It really puts the future in His hands. Will the ministry grow or will it be no more? Will we be able to produce one more study or twenty or none? We don’t know.

But in this great freedom I confess that there is occasional anxiety. I want to know every curve, every fork, and every detour along the way. I want to know for sure where we are going and what it will be like when we get there. I want to know the future and sometimes can’t understand why every now and then God won’t pull the curtain back a little bit for me to see it. But then this Christmas I think in some ways He did that.

While I was reading the Christmas story for about the tenth time this month I was caught off guard with one verse. An angel of the Lord appeared to Zechariah while he was doing his priestly duties in the temple and informed the old man that he was going to have a son by his equally old wife. And then he said this…now pay attention to these words...

“And it is he who will go as a forerunner before Him (Jesus) in the spirit and power of Elijah, to turn the hearts of the fathers back to their children, and the disobedient to the attitude of the righteous; so as to make ready a people prepared for the Lord.” Luke 1:17-18

Turn hearts… turn the disobedient…..prepare for the Lord. There it was. A clear summary of what we are trying to accomplish through our new study, “Be Amazing”. We want to turn the hearts of women back to their families, their children, their husbands…and turn them to an attitude of righteousness, of obedience. And the reason is a good one. Christ is coming soon. So we may be able to be a small tool that can prepare a people for His return.

So what would that look like practically? Well it would pretty much put an end to abortions, not because there would be no “unwanted babies”, there simply would not be babies that were not wanted. There would be marriage and in that environment children would be born…not a by-product of a one night stand or casual sex without marriage, but the child would be a welcomed member of society. A woman WOULD have control over her own body and she would choose to control it until there was a safe and loving family in which to bring a child.

There would be an enormous dent in pornography if women chose to keep their clothes on, to exhibit no behavior that would cause lust, to behave in ways that demanded and received respect. Sorry Hugh Hefner, you would have to take the bathrobe off and put on a suit and go get a job doing something other than using women for your own purposes. Teens would put sexting aside for perhaps higher goals other than exploiting their bodies, and in doing so may even gain more respect for themselves.

And perhaps home would cease being war zones or drop-off stations. There would actually be someone there creating a refuge, a calm place for not only love to grow but also character and integrity development. Perhaps there could be exceptional kindness and a greater value on wisdom and sensibility.

And perhaps children would not have gaping holes in their soul that are frantically trying to be filled with sex and drugs and alcohol. Perhaps they could look to their mother as the best example on how to live life wholly and successfully.

And perhaps on the day when that trumpet blows, there will be a huge army of women answering the call and leaving behind a nation that was blessed greatly by their very presence. Just perhaps.

The wise woman builds her house…..

Proverbs 14:1

The Sky Is Falling

“The sky is falling, the sky is falling”, cried Chicken Little at the top of her lungs in the children’s book by the same title. I have heard a lot of that lately for daily there are voices coming from every direction that tell of the terrible mess America is in and it seems like the sky is falling! Those of us who have lived in America longer than a couple of decades can see things are changing and at times it seems they are coming with a rapidity that boggles and frightens the mind. I realized that when I saw people yelling with great emotion to take God out of the platform at the Democratic Convention. I am shaken to the core when I read about sex slavery in America or a teacher being fired because he shared his belief in God with one of his students or a mother killing her children. Today I received another YouTube speech. A wealthy and successful businessman was telling of a possible future that could be ruinous. Last night in small group we all spoke with concern about the possibility that religious freedoms may soon be lost. Every day there are constant reminders that the sky does indeed seem to be falling and there is nothing we can do about it.

All of this is true. The sky IS falling. And the world IS falling. And man IS falling. And we should expect nothing less. This is not something new. It started in Genesis chapter three and it has been pretty much falling ever since. The sky was falling when Adam and Eve were kicked out of the garden and soon their family was tragically devastated when Cain killed Abel and had to run for his life. The sky was falling when the flood covered the earth. The sky was falling when Babylon crushed Judah and people ended up eating their own children. The sky fell when Rome was burning Christians at the stake or feeding them to lions for sport. The sky was falling during the Revolutionary War, the Civil War and World Wars one and two and now we are on the brink we are told of another catastrophic event ... all depending on who gets elected.

But among all of the fear of the election, all of the anxiety of the “what if”, all of the chilling stories and heart break and a future that is tenuous, there is a voice rising above all of the others. I WILL build my church and the powers of hell WILL NOT prevail against it”. That is a promise. And those who believe in Jesus Christ and trust in Him ARE the church.

Will life change as we know it? Perhaps. Is the sky falling? Possibly. Does the sky falling have anything to do with my true identity or my true future? I think not. As the voices continue to cry out, the voice that is that still small voice gets my vote and attention. It is emphatic. I WILL. It clearly says what will be done. “Build my church” And it says what will prevail against it…NOTHING!

So we may lose religious freedom. We may lose our financial security. We may lose the democratic government. But we will NOT lose what is most dear to us: Jesus Christ and HIS church.

So today I am going to vote and I will vote for the one I think best represents the laws of God. But I am also going to plug my ears and close my eyes to the Chicken Little’s of this world. I have my instructions in hand. I am going to be a part of the work Christ is doing and what He is doing is building His church in His great kingdom and in His Kingdom the firmament is unbreakable. So cry on Chicken Little.

I will build My church and the gates of Hell shall not prevail against it.

Matthew 16:18

You Can Never Go Home Again

They say you can never go home again. I thought I had proved them wrong when I went back to my home town of Ludington, Michigan to speak at a Women’s Conference this past week. I had left almost fifty years ago when I went off to college and never returned as a resident again. There were occasional brief visits, usually in the presence of kids and husband. Neither thought touring the town slowly, reminiscing over each and every block was entertainment and so it was never done.

So this trip, a true gift from God, was something I looked forward to with great anticipation. At last the day came. I flew into the closest airport which is about 100 miles from the small town. I rented a fun little car and drove along familiar highways through fruit farms and over hill and dale (literally), moving farther and farther away from city life. As I rounded the bend, I could see the smoke stacks from Dow Chemical Company where my father had been employed for over forty years. I would learn that the company had been shut down for some time and another lesser known one had taken over. I drove across the marsh, over the train tracks to the intersection where the Kountry Kupboard welcomes campers and tourists to enjoy a home cooked meal. I turned left and within a block saw the sign that said I was HOME. “Welcome to Ludington, Michigan the home of the 1994 Soccer State Champions (Don’t hold me to the details, but I do know it was home of something in the sports field.)

Everything looks the same. The old lumber baron homes have been beautifully maintained. The downtown buildings are the same and at the end of the down town is the most popular building in the county. It is the home of the House of Flavors, once a small ice cream store now a booming restaurant that serves up more sundaes, sodas and legendary malted milk shakes than any place in the world. They have a breakfast, lunch and dinner menu specializing in not just the best ice cream around but also turkey. An interesting combination for sure but it works. The Neal family has run that business since I was about five years old, passing it down from generation to generation and each one adds more room, more creativity and more delicious food offerings.

Two more blocks and I was right in front of the beautiful yellow sandy beach of Lake Michigan. Off to the left and past the break wall sat the Badger, an enormous old car ferry that transports cars, people, trains and anything else from the west side of Michigan to the east side of Wisconsin. Approaching winter, that actually comes about the first of October; the Badger shuts down until spring starts warming things up. I drove up and down each street past my parent’s best friend’s homes. I drove out to Hamlin Lake where as a young person I had kept my small wooden sailboat. I drove through the miles of sand dunes to the state park and remembered as a teen drag racing on that road. It really looked like nothing had changed.

Soon it was time for the conference to begin; I got ready and arrived on time. And there was the first clear taste of the fact that you can’t go home, as you once knew it. Many of my high school dear friends were there. They had changed. No longer were they fresh faced, beauties but mature older grandmothers. Some had lost husbands. Some had lost children. Some had lost health. But they were there and behind the grey hair and the thin lines on their faces, they were my “high school” friends and yet they had spent forty years living lives that I was not a part of and I also have lived life without them.

Ludington as a town has changed very little but all that made Ludington home has changed dramatically. Houses that once welcomed me no matter when I showed up are now closed to my intrusion. Strangers live there now. So many of the people who loved me have passed on. Most of my classmates left after college seeking better jobs and retired people have moved in finding the lake environment compelling. And in the end I was sad and the thought occurred to me that indeed you can never go home again.

At the airport I pulled a little slip of paper out of my coat that Judy had given me at the conference. It had a name and telephone number on it. “Call Tom”, she said. “He wants to say hello”. It was the name another high school classmate.

And so I made the call. The voice answered full of good cheer and before I could identify myself he said “Patsy, I am so glad you called!” And from there we spent the next 45 minutes catching each other up on our lives. And during that conversation I found the answer to my sadness. I am not home. As Tom talked about his wife who had passed away last year he confirmed a deep and abiding faith in the Lord. He spoke with confidence and assurance that one day they/we would all be together. And then we would be home and never have to leave again and there would be no more good-byes.

Ludington isn’t my home, nor is it Beager’s, Joyce’s, Jeanie’s, Barb’s, Judy’s, Sara’s, Deedee’s nor Tom’s. Our home is waiting and as I looked around at those people who I loved even after all these years I saw it is not far away.

Hebrews 11:16

But now they desire a better, that is, a heavenly country. 

Therefore God is not ashamed to be called their God, for He has prepared a city for them.

Going Home

I have been asked to be a speaker at the Lake Shore Non Denominational Women’s Conference in October. It will be held in my home town, a place that I have not lived in since I was eighteen when I went away to college. When I left, I had just received the ignominious title of “Class Flirt” from my senior class mates. Now I will return …as a Bible teacher.

It is ironic for sure. But more than that, it is a remarkable statement of the power of God to transform lives. And so I will go. I am looking forward to having the time to simply drive up and down the streets of the town. It is a small town of only 9000 people but it sits on the shores of Lake Michigan and thus is a favorite resort area in the summer. Beautiful lakes, miles of sandy beaches and sand dunes, and lovely parks make it a perfect vacation spot. But for me it is simply “home”. Every block holds a memory and almost all of them are good ones. I can easily be transported back in time to the neighborhood friends that made every day an adventure. High School expanded those borders with a few hundred more friends added to the list. Summers were spent on the beach which had a huge break-wall where we would practice diving from about ten feet in the air. There was freedom. I would ride my bike out of our driveway in the morning and would return before dinner. The entire town was my playground and my bike was the best transportation in a town that has no hills.

The theme of the conference comes from John 14:27. “Peace I leave with you. My peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your heart be troubled, nor let it be afraid.” This is the perfect verse for me to speak on, for though this beautiful town holds so many wonderful memories for me, it also was the birthplace of fear. Childish pranks left an indelible wound in my soul. Fear followed me to college where a traumatic experience deepened the wound so much that I was hardly able to function. It pervaded my whole being and of course I took that into marriage and motherhood. Nothing healed the wound and courage was illusive until I was thirty two years old. The healer? Jesus Christ.

So I will return to the “birthplace” of fear. And I will return with a message. Jesus was not kidding when He said “I will give you peace”. As with everything Jesus said, it is the truth. He has proven it over and over again to me.

Now the challenge stands before me. Can I articulate the power of Christ in such a way that those in the audience can understand the gospel and embrace it with all that they have? I am not sure. But I do know Christ has promised the “Comforter” can and will speak through me. My job is to go. His job is to change lives. I will be in good company.

John 14:27

“Peace I leave with you. My peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your heart be troubled, nor let it be afraid.”

The Pinch Collar

It was the collar that made the difference. We had chosen Betsy because we thought Jim was lonesome. He looked lonesome. He didn’t play much nor was he interested in things like balls and sticks. That was unnatural for a dog and thus we began to think about a young lady dog to spice up his life.

I found the perfect dog on the 4th of July when I went into Petco to buy some dog food. The Humane Society was there and so was Betsy in a cage looking for someone to take her home. She was beautiful, the same color as Jim and gentle spirited. So the money was paid, a collar and leash were bought and Betsy came home with us.

Jim’s life picked up more than we could imagine. Betsy chewed on his ears and tormented him at every chance. He wanted to nap, Betsy wanted to play. He wanted to eat lunch. Betsy wanted to play. He wanted to get away from her but Betsy would track him down and mercilessly jump on him until he would play.

But Betsy had a few other habits that were not endearing. She loved pillows. And so she systematically tore up about eight of our decorative pillows. Once those were out of the way she attacked three couch cushions and tore them to shreds. She chewed all of the chair cushions from the furniture on the porch. She chewed the wires from the CD player and two porch lamps. She dug holes in the yard. She got to the Amazon delivery before I did and shredded the package (three books to be exact) to smithereens. The day came when we were at our wits end and forked over a very large sum of money and hired a dog whisperer.

He came with a collar that looked like some torture instrument. It was metal, and had sharp prongs jutting out every inch or so. Betsy saw what was coming and tried to back away from it but the DW was quicker and so the collar went on Betsy. “It won’t hurt her unless she pulls away from me” he said with confidence. And so the training began. One hour later, Betsy the Brat was obedient, quick to obey and calm. A transformation had taken place.

He left with some good advice.

1. Keep her by your side as much as you can during the day so she doesn’t get bored, distracted or lonely. She will sense your presence and rest.

2. Set up opportunities for her to disobey but have a catch…like an Amazon box soaked in hot sauce not to injure her but to teach her.

3. Praise her greatly when she does what is right.

4. Show your love through affection.

That was a year ago. Our house is once again calm. Jim is sleeping under the table as I write and Betsy is curled up in her favorite chair napping. New cushions are on the porch furniture and the decorative pillows in the living room have been replaced. Amazon delivers without fear and our walks in the morning are totally delightful with both dogs by my side. Jim seems to have good feeling towards Betsy and sometimes they will lie on the floor side by side with Jim affectionately licking her ears. Yes things are different around here now thanks to a pinch collar.

God has his own pinch collar I am convinced. Oh we can’t see it but for sure all of us at one time or another have felt it. Sometimes it comes in circumstances that are excruciatingly painful. Sometimes it comes through the stirring of the conscience or the rebuke of a friend. Sometimes it comes through illness, or disappointments. But it will involve some pain. And behind the pinch is a God who is working to make us better, to develop our character or make us more sensitive to others, or change the path we are on.

I have seen what the effects a pinch collar in the hands of an expert can do and it is good. And yet my Father’s hand is always for our best. And in the end the advice is much the same:

1. Stay near to the Father so you will sense His presence and rest.

2. He sets up opportunities for us to learn and grow, not to destroy and injure.

3. And when we do right, we do feel the good pleasure of God Himself.

4. And lastly, throughout His word He assures us of His love for us and His great affection for His children.

Betsy doesn’t know it but that pinch collar was necessary because we loved her and wanted her to learn to live a civilized life. Our Lord has said He would lead also with bonds of love so we might learn to live well. Betsy’s “bonds” have led to a quiet home but even more so God’s lead to a quiet and satisfied heart. And that is better still.

Hosea 11: 3

I took them in My arms; …

I led them with bonds of love…

And I bent down and fed them.